Being single again for 10 years, I have had plenty of opportunities to pray. I have poured out my heart to God over circumstances that seemed overwhelming, impossible, and heartbreaking. I have struggled with feelings that threatened to sink my emotional ship in a sea that rose to tsunami proportions. At times I have wondered where God was. My identity felt uncertain and I feared I would be alone the rest of my life. Through these difficult experiences, God has taught me about prayers for singles.
If you are single, you may be wondering:
- How do you pray when you’re single?
- How do single ladies pray?
- Can I pray for someone to like me?
- Can I ask God for a specific person?
We are going to tackle all of that and more.
The Importance of prayer for singles
In a culture that worships “prince charming” and “happily ever after”, single women are often looked upon as second-class citizens. There is an underlying question of, “why can’t she find a partner?” With this kind of pressure, prayer for singles is extremely important.
Additionally, single women struggle with emotions common to all women. But loneliness, lack of self-confidence, anxiety, fear, and sometimes anger can be much more intense. As these feelings sweep over a woman’s life, prayer is essential for her emotional survival.
How do you pray when you’re single?
Our purpose in life is the same whether we are married or not.
“And whatsoever ye do, in word or in deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” Colossians 3:17 ESV
Prayers for singles should bring glory to God, springing from a heart of gratitude. We may not appreciate the fact that we are single, however our circumstances are not where gratitude comes from. Giving thanks for God’s goodness is what brings us joy and glorifies Him. That can be done regardless of our marital status.
This then is an example of how single ladies pray.
“Father God, you have been so good to me.
While others have _______ (abandoned me, abused me, or have not noticed me), you have always been faithful.
You will never leave me and for that, I am grateful. You have promised to heal my broken heart and that brings me hope.
I know that you see me and understand just what I am feeling, and that brings me comfort. You always know where I am and what I am doing, delighting in me, and that gives me confidence. You have promised to make something good from my disappointments.
Accept my prayer to you and help me to see more and more of your precious gifts. Help me to learn to love you more. May I bring honor and glory to your name in this season of being single. Amen.”
Can I pray for someone to like me?
It is more important for us to have God’s approval than that of others. As we become more like Jesus, others will automatically be drawn toward us.
If our focus is on what we do not have, it will hurt our relationship with God.
When we feel the need to pray for someone to like us, asking to be conformed to the image of Christ is a better prayer for singles. This kind of prayer is a win for everyone, while at the same time pleases God.
Can I ask God for a specific person?
“Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” (Psalm 37:4)
My paraphrase of this verse is, “As you delight in the Lord, He will give you desires that align with His will.”
Do you see the difference? The first quote from the ESV could be misinterpreted as a promise for how to get what I want. This mindset reduces God to a magic genie. It starts with “us” and not God.
The second paraphrase lets God create His desires within us. We should not have our heart set on a certain someone when we do not know if that person is part of God’s plan for us. Here is an example of a prayer for singles when you want to ask God for a specific person.
“Father God, I have noticed _______ (insert name of person), and I would like for him to like me.
However, I do not know if that is your plan. I want to glorify you through obedience to your will.
Fill me with your desires because I know that you are good and only want what is best for me.
I know that you love me more than any human could. Help me to accept your answer whether it be “yes”, “no”, or “not now”. Help me to delight in you every day as I wait.”
Prayers for singles
If you are single, you should pray about everything. Prayers for singles would include:
- The desire to be married, which is quite normal. Unfortunately, it can get out of control, fueled by a sense of loneliness. Then losing perspective, the single woman can rush headlong into relationships while overlooking “red flags” that can cause great heartache down the road.
- Feelings of loneliness that can seem overwhelming. Sometimes singles think they can not survive these feelings and often try to fix it with a romantic relationship. There is no doubt that singles experience times of loneliness. But let me assure you that many married people feel lonely. Does that surprize you? Being single is not the cause of loneliness.
- War room prayers for the temptations that are so common for single women. “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in heavenly places. Therefore take up the full armor of God . . . ” Ephesians 6:12-13a
- Fears of being single for the rest of our lives. In the garden of Eden, Eve was convinced that God was holding back something that was good for her. Her sin sprang from ingratitude for what she already had, and a lack of trust in God. This mindset caused her great heartache from that day forward. We too can expect heartache to result when we trust our own instincts over God’s direction. We must remember that God does not withhold good things from those who walk uprightly. If marriage hasn’t happened yet, then He has something better for us right now. (Proverbs 3:5-6, Psalm 119:105 and 11, Psalm 84:16b)
- All the other aspects of our lives.
A marriage prayer for singles
“Lord, I know that marriage is ordained by you, and a means to serve you. Help me to trust you and not take matters into my own hands.
While I am waiting, please help me to be conformed to the image of Jesus so that I may demonstrate what it means to serve and not be served.
Help me to learn to love you so much that it spills over into those around me. Help me to find purpose and glorify you in this season of singleness.”
A prayer for lonely singles
“Lord, sometimes I feel so lonely. Yet I know that you will never leave me. Thank you that I can always trust you and your word.
Remind me often that I can not trust my ever-changing feelings. Thank you that you never change. Help me to serve others as unto you as I live my single life.”
(Psalm 33:11, Hebrews 13:8, Isaiah 40:8, 1 Thessalonians 5:11)
A war room prayer for singles
Lord, today I am struggling with temptation to __________.
You have told me in your word that no temptation is too great for me to bear, but that you will make a way to escape.
You have also said that much of our battles begin in the mind and that we need to change the way we think.
I ask that you will protect my mind from the lies of the evil one. Guard my heart so that I only allow YOU to move it.
Speak to me loud and clear any time that I am moving toward temptation. Give me a heart that longs to do only your will.”
1 Corinthians 10:13, Romans 12:2, Proverbs 4:23, Psalm 51:10
A prayer for overcoming the fear of being single
“Lord, sometimes I fear being single the rest of my life. I don’t want to be like Eve who believed that you were withholding something good.
You have given me many gifts and I want to be grateful for them. Help me to renew my mind as I know that your plans for me are good. Whether that be marriage or not, I trust you.”
Genesis 3, Jeremiah 29:11,1 Thessalonians 5:13, Romans 12:2
Other prayers for singles
Not being married is only one of many issues that concern single women. Our circumstances rarely leave us in a vacuum. Other people are often affected. Here are other prayers for singles.
A prayer for single parents
“Lord, sometimes I feel so inadequate as a single parent. How I wish I could shield my children from all the realities of the single life. It hurts that holidays and so many other things have changed. Yet I know that you love my children more than I ever could.
Help me to trust them to your care. Convict them of sin and help them to put their trust in you just as you are teaching me to trust you. Help them to find their identity in you, not their peers. Give me wisdom as a single parent.”
Proverbs 22:6, Psalm 139:23-24, Matthew 22:37, Proverbs 3:5-6, 2 Corinthians 5:17
A prayer for widows
“Lord, you know how much I loved sharing life with ________ . It hurts so much that he is gone. Yet I choose to thank you for the years that you allowed us to be married.
Thank you for the many beautiful memories. When I am tempted to feel angry about the loss, help me to remember all the many gifts from you that I still have.
Thank you that you love widows and provide for their needs. May I bless your name every day. Help me to be grateful and continue to find my joy in you no matter what.”
1 Thessalonians 5:18, Psalm 68:5, Psalm 16:11, Nehemiah 8:10
A prayer for those who are single-again
“Lord, being single-again is scary. Help me to not enter the dating scene for the wrong reasons.
Thank you that you will give me wisdom as I ask for it.
Help me to understand that you are always with me and always faithful. Remind me often that my relationship with you is more important than anything else. I want to fall in love with you more.
Guard my heart and protect it from the lies of the evil one.”
James 1:5, 1 Corinthians 10:13, Hebrews 13:5, Matthew 5:6, Proverbs 4:23
A prayer for the never-married single
“Lord, all my friends are settling down and having families and here I am still single. I confess that sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with me that marriage has not come my way. Guard my heart and feelings as I know that you delight in me and you always have.
Remind me that my identity is in you and that you alone make me complete. Help me to be conformed to the image of Jesus so that when you bring me a partner, I will be the person you created me to be.”
Proverbs 4:23, Psalm 139, Romans 12:2
Other prayer topics for singles
Every area of a single woman’s life should be covered by prayer. Making God part of our single journey is crucial to having hope, joy, and peace. Solo life is not easy so prayers for singles are one way to ensure success.
Prayers for singles to learn forgiveness
You may be wondering what forgiveness has to do with prayers for singles.
It is unfortunate, but many single women have experienced some kind of hurt that can lead to bitterness. For this reason, singles must learn to forgive.
This choice is not for the benefit of the one who hurt us, but for our own healing. Without forgiveness, we become trapped in an emotional prison.
It is a lie that we can’t and shouldn’t forgive. You might think that forgiveness means condoning bad behavior, along with other misconceptions. Instead, forgiveness is letting God take care of the consequences for those who hurt us. That, my friend, sets us free.
I challenge you to pray for a forgiving spirit.
Prayers to find joy in the journey
A friend of mine once said, “life does not begin when you get married. It begins when Christ pulls you out of the grave.”
If we believe that, then we can have joy wherever the journey may lead. We don’t have to try to find the “right person”. We are free to live every day in the joy of the Lord.
Having joy in the journey is tied closely to a growing sense of gratitude. I challenge you to begin making a list of everything you can thank God for. Then tell God how much you appreciate His gifts. These prayers will make your life more joyful.
Here’s the thing to think about when you are thinking about prayers for singles. There is literally nothing that single women can not pray about. Prayer is simply a conversation with God about our hopes, dreams, fears, concerns, joys, needs, and most importantly, our love for Him. It is also an expression of our gratitude for who God is and what He does.
Prayers for singles is the lifeline that helps us not only survive but also thrive. Blessings to each of us as we apply these truths to our lives!
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