Have you ever prayed for your future family members?
You are more likely to pray for your current family members.
You pray for those closest to you. Your spouse, your children, your roommate. The extended family members who don’t currently live with you: your parents, siblings, their families, grandparents, aunts, uncles. And the list goes on.
Praying for future family members
But have you ever prayed for those future family members who will come into your family and be an integral part of being close to those you love?
The in-laws. Your son-in-law or daughter-in-law.
What prayers for future family members should I pray?
There are not specific prayers listed in the Bible that should be said for your son-in-law or daughter-in-law. There are many references to son-in-laws and daughter-in-laws in several Old Testament scriptures, but none in the Bible that tell you what to pray.
Yet, we know how important it is to pray.
There are three main concepts that should be considered in praying for your future family members.
1. Pray for the salvation of your son-in-law or daughter-in-law.
God made it really clear throughout the Bible that a believer should marry another believer. From the Old Testament, Moses wrote about not intermarrying with those living in the land as they would turn away your sons from following God to serve their gods (Deut. 7:3-4).
Solomon was a prime example of what happens when you marry unbelievers. And he married many unbelieving women. Solomon knew what God’s Word said yet he ‘clung to them in love.’ These women, all 700 wives and 300 concubines, had turned Solomon’s heart away from God (1 Kings 11:3).
In the New Testament, Paul tells the Corinthians,
“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” 2 Corin 6:14
The concept of the yoked comes from when oxen are tied together to till the land. The two have to become a team of one in order to complete the work together. If they don’t, they work against each other.
This is why Paul compares yoked together with night and day. The two do not belong together nor can logistically happen at the same time. We see dawn or dusk break the horizon barrier. Other than that, it is either dark or light. Similarly, you are either walking with God in the light or walking in darkness with Satan.
This concept is explained further in the Sermon on the Mount where Jesus explains that you cannot serve two masters. You either love one and hate the other. In this passage, He is talking about not serving God and money at the same time (Matthew 6:24).
God talks about the husband and wife being a team or united as one flesh. The two are no longer two persons but one person (Genesis 2:24, Mark 10:8). The two people become one with each, not just physically, but heart and soul.
2. Pray your son-in-law loves your daughter like Christ loves the church.
Pray your daughter-in-law submits to your son and respects him in the same way he submits to the church and respects her.
And pray that each of them submit to each other out of reverence for Christ (Eph 6:21-33).
3. Pray that each of them would love like Paul talks about in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. Read through each concept and pray this over them. Love is patient, love is kind, etc.
4. Pray that Satan will be kept far away from their marriage and that they will keep the focus of their marriage on Christ.
Does praying for future family members make a difference?
Does praying for your future son-in-law or daughter-in-law make a difference? Yes, it does!
When Ruth gleaned the fields of Boaz and sought him out as her kinsman-redeemer, scripture doesn’t say that Naomi prayed for her daughter-in-law. However, scripture does say that Ruth was seen as a blessing to Naomi.
Naomi’s friends told her that because she bore her a grandson, your “daughter-in-law who loves you… is more to you than seven sons.” Ruth 4:15
Naomi who was bitter, from the death of her husband and two sons, was now blessed by her daughter-in-law.
Praying for future family members does make a difference
I can definitely say that prayers for your son-in-law or daughter-in-law does make a difference. And you can start saying those prayers long before your children start dating and looking for their mate.
After we brought our daughter home from the hospital, I would nurse her in the night and pray for her future husband. I would pray that he would love the Lord with all his heart, soul and strength. And that he would love our daughter like Christ loves the church.
Then when our son was born. I did the same thing and prayed the same prayers for my daughter-in-law.
Today, our children are married to believing spouses who love the Lord as their Savior. I believe that they love our children like Christ does and have a 1 Corinthians 13 type of love. I often refer to our two ‘in-law’ children as our ‘son-in-love’ and ‘daughter-in-love.’ They were brought into our family because our children love them and we in turn love them too.
Is everything in their marriages a bed of roses? No. But they get through the trials by keeping their eyes on God, trying to submit to each other out of reference for Christ and relying on the Holy Spirit’s power to carry them along.
As you pray for your children, I want to encourage you to pray for your future family members. These children will one day marry your son or daughter and they become your family, too.
It is such a blessing to see how God answers these prayers for your future family members!